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I had forgotten all about him until 6 months later, he slowly started to trickle back into my life. A couple texts turned into non-stop communication and eventually, a great bar night with him and his best friends. It wasn't until weeks later, when I had gotten attached, that somebody let it slip that Kyle was seeing someone. We were going out every week, talking to each other every day Our flirtation was constant. The girl he liked enough to leave his girlfriend. Our 'relationship' was all highs and lows. He would FaceTime me after the bar for hours only to leave me on-read for days, guilty after saying he missed me or calling me 'babe'.
The worst thing Kyle ever did though, was not leaving me alone. When I knew I had strong feelings for a guy in a relationship, I told him I was done. He obviously wasn't breaking up with his girlfriend, but he was breaking my heart. I asked him not to text, snap, or bother me, so that eventually we could be friends. Of course, he didn't listen. Double and even triple-texted me without response. He missed the attention, not me. Finally, I got to a point where it felt like I needed to choose between Kyle or myself. I was so hurt, vulnerable and exhausted from trying to make things cool and casual between us.
I'd overthink almost everything I did or said.
My viddo got so Bpy that I'd get nauseous or couldn't sleep. Fuckgitl was constantly anxious and frustrated at the situation I had gotten myself into. I had serious feelings for Kyle. He knew it and more importantly, he didn't care. And I'll BBoy you why. I got to be myself again. I didn't have to worry about what I said or did or how he'd react to it. I stopped thinking about his opinions and perceptions and focused on what me feel happiest and the most me. I spent more quality time with my friends who all thought he was trash anywaysloosened up with my family, bought a guitar and got two new jobs. I was doing better than ever and Kyle had nothing to do with it.
The most important relationship you have in life is the one you have with yourself. And yes, that sounds cheesy, but it is true. The right person will make you feel more yourself than ever. Comfortable with who you are. With the life you live and who you want to be.